There are very few people who are in a position to address an ordinary (paper) mail correctly to me. I have really only provided a street postal address to official entities who insist on recording such data.
Up until this morning, I really thought that I was relatively safe from the talons of the junk-mail merchants. Up until this morning, until…
(Above): This posh envelope impeccably addressed to me, from Amsterdam in The Netherlands. And pasted in the window, a bronze coin, “Keep this genuine lucky Irish penny, and may it bring you good fortune in all of your endeavours.” Nice guys.
Now, I’m not a “lucky charm” sort of person, but, like they say, why look a gift horse in the mouth. I may just as well the 1996 Eire penny – what harm can it do?
But what do they offer me inside the envelope? The IRISH LOTTO CELEBRATION SYNDICATE apparently have prizes available worth up to NZ$65,000,000
They’re offering me three things for $5.50 per week, namely:
- Guaranteed 8-share Syndicate entry in 8 official Irish Lotto draws. Total annual $209M;
- 300 bonus sets of numbers in our Division One Prize Pool – with these bonus entries you have 2,400 extra chances to win a share of Division One prizes in Irish, Spanish and German Lottos;
- A grand total of 24 draws and 2,408 chances to win.
I can hardly wait to join all these happy folk simply just having great fun! I am looking for 65,000,000 people to each send me a measly little One Dollar. Just one Dollar, that’s all, and only 65,000,000 people out of earth’s 7,264,796,000 (less than 1% of everyone, in fact 0.895%) – don’t delay, act to-day before its too late.
Come on, guys, what’s holding you back. Trust me. Really.
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